How To Manage Your Rampant Anxiety During Times Of Extreme Stress
by Marissa Pomerance
The irony of writing an article about how to manage anxiety is not lost on me, because my own anxiety is still, by no means, fully “managed.” Over the past 12 months, it’s become my virtually-constant companion—a never-ending loop of thoughts that can lead to such palpable dread, it can actually change my vital signs within seconds. These untenable levels of anxiety forced me to finally seek out treatment, which is why I’m not totally unqualified to be here.
My rising levels of anxiety are not unique; 39% of American adults reported being more anxious in 2018 than they were the year prior, while 18% of American adults (that’s 40 million people) have anxiety disorder. And with a global pandemic changing virtually every aspect of our lives right now, those numbers are likely much, much higher.
But even though anxiety is completely “normal,” that doesn’t mean it isn’t totally fucking debilitating. And the overwhelming fear caused by our current news cycle has only made the need for true mental and emotional self-care even more important. But while people (the kinds of people who have likely never suffered from anxiety) will tell you to “just stay calm” or “don’t overreact,” in practice, trying to suppress anxiety by silently throwing “logic” at these irrational thoughts and fears is one of the most exhausting, futile exercises you can engage in. If anxiety easily responded to logic, then no one would have it because we all have the ability to silently scream “you’re going to be fine!” at ourselves. Or, as my therapist helpfully explained, “if the power of positive thinking worked, I wouldn’t have a job.”
Sometimes, the scariest thing about anxiety isn’t just its ability to fully consume you; instead, it’s recognizing that your anxiety has become so debilitating, that you will soon lose the ability to function unless you finally seek out help. Asking for help can be almost as terrifying as anxiety itself. And we’re sorry (truly, very personally deeply sorry), but there’s just no quick fix. We promise, we’re not trying to make your anxiety worse; in fact, there are a lot of proven, effective ways to treat anxiety.
So while it’s totally understandable to be caught in an anxiety spiral amidst our current, fear-inducing climate, here are a few things you can do, right now, to help manage it.
1. Call Your Therapist
When you’re in the throes of a panic spiral, the thought of finding a therapist and going to months of sessions before noticing a “result” probably won’t ease your worries. But the truth is that therapy is still one of the most effective methods of treating and managing anxiety. And since human interaction isn’t exactly encouraged right now, there are tons of therapists who offer over-the-phone or skype sessions, so you can still seek out treatment even if you’re self-quarantined. We also understand that therapy is a financial luxury, so here are some free hotlines, and a few hotlines specifically for anxiety, that anyone can call.
Therapy isn’t like medication; it doesn’t suppress anxious feelings or eradicate all the physiological symptoms that come with it. Instead, therapy aims to manage anxiety, and change our relationship to it. Anxiety, like a chronic illness, might never fully disappear, and a good therapist will recognize this truth. Therapy isn’t just an opportunity to talk or share your feelings; a good therapist will use real, tested scientific methods of treatment to help you to develop different tools for recognizing and managing anxiety.
Since anxiety can present as Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), panic disorder, social anxiety, OCD, PTSD, or a specific phobia, different modes of therapy can be more effective at treating different forms of anxiety. And these are a few of the most effective modes of therapy:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT, is widely considered one of the most effective forms of psychotherapy for treating anxiety. Therapists use CBT to recognize the fundamental patterns of thinking and behavior that feed the cycle of anxiety and panic.
These thought patterns, like worrying about irrational catastrophes, can lead to feelings of fear, stoking anxiety. Meanwhile, anxious thoughts and feelings feed into patterns of behavior like compulsive rituals and assurance-seeking (for example, Googling symptoms of an illness). Though these behaviors are used as an escape from anxiety, in practice, they can prevent a deeper understanding of the kinds of situations that trigger panic, and whether those situations are inherently dangerous.
Without the tools to address our flawed behavioral and thought patterns, our anxiety only gets worse, causing those aforementioned panic spirals.
CBT forces us to acknowledge these thoughts and behaviors, examining how they fuel anxiety; it then teaches us how to adjust our thoughts and behaviors to better deal with our anxiety triggers and prevent future spirals.
EMDR
EMDR, short for “eye movement desensitization and reprocessing,” has gained prominence over the last few decades for its supposed effectiveness in treating anxiety.
And yes, the name IS incredibly confusing. Essentially, EMDR therapists have clients think of their anxiety triggers (like a memory of an anxiety-inducing situation) while moving their eyes back and forth to match the movements of a therapist’s finger. EMDR also involves replacing negative thoughts with positive thoughts, which can be especially effective for PTSD.
Of course, EMDR is best administered in conjunction with traditional talk therapy and supportive listening. But many scientists believe that the benefits of EMDR come from exposure—that is, exposing clients to their fears by making them imagine them—and not as much from the actual eye movements.
Tapping
Also known as EFT or “emotional freedom technique,” tapping is exactly what it sounds like—this technique helps treat anxiety by having anxiety-sufferers tap on different parts of their body.
Proponents of tapping have suggested that it works for both the psychological and physical effects of anxiety by offering both a psychological distraction and a physical sensation that calms the body.
This sense of physical calm can even lead to actual changes in blood pressure, heart rate, and cortisol. In studies of tapping, “psychological measurements, including anxiety, depression, PTSD, pain, and cravings all improved. Physiological indicators, including RHR, BP, and cortisol also significantly decreased.”
And a decrease in cortisol (the stress hormone) isn’t just great for anxiety, but has “a wide spectrum of positive health effects, including increased muscle mass, increased bone density, improved skin elasticity, enhancement of cognitive function especially learning and attention, and enhanced cell signaling.”
2. Meditate
Like therapy, meditation can feel like a vague, amorphous item on our to-do list that, honestly, we’ll probably never get to. But since you have a bit of extra time right now, why not give it a go, even if the idea of sitting in silence, focusing on breathing, and doing nothing sounds simultaneously appealing and utterly alarming to an anxious mind.
Think of it this way— meditation is actually sort of like exercising. It’s a way to train your mind like you train your body. It’s also a cheap and quick way to address anxiety when we can’t make it to our therapist’s office. Here’s why:
Meditation can actually change your brain.
According to Headspace, the meditation app founded by Buddhist monk (yes, that is a true sentence) Andy Puddicombe, “anxiety is a cognitive state connected to an inability to regulate emotions. But research shows that a consistent meditation practice reprograms neural pathways in the brain and, therefore, improves our ability to regulate emotions.”
Meditation practice can even affect the size of the amygdala, which plays a role in the perception of emotions (like fear), and can thicken the prefrontal cortex, which is the part of the brain responsible for awareness, leading to “mental resilience.” Both of these physical changes in the brain can aid our ability to manage anxiety.
Meditation changes our relationship to anxiety.
Meditation, like CBT, helps us recognize and note anxiety-stoking thoughts and behaviors. It allows us to acknowledge them, be present with them, and then let them go, teaching us “two important things: thoughts do not define us, and thoughts are not real. Within this newfound perspective, we are able to gradually change our relationship with anxiety, differentiating between what is an irrational episode and what’s true.”
Meditation gives us tools for managing the physical effects of anxiety.
A common technique in guided meditations is a “body scan,” which has us consider how every part of the body feels, making us more aware of our physical sensations. This body awareness allows “you [to] sit with your senses in the same way you sit with your thoughts. This go-to technique can provide a safe place that can be repeatedly accessed whenever anxiety starts to creep in.”
And since anxiety can have serious physiological effects on the nervous system, it generally leads to increasing levels of stress hormones epinephrine and cortisol. According to Headspace, “too much epinephrine can increase the risk of heart attacks and strokes; too much cortisol can affect our health in numerous ways — including increasing blood sugar levels, suppressing the immune system, and constricting blood vessels.”
Meditation counters this physiological response to stress, “leading to a decrease in blood pressure, heart rate, and oxygen consumption.”
3. Don’t Want To Meditate? Try Paced Breathing.
We know, “breathing techniques” are so cliché and sound like the advice of a friend who’s never had anxiety, and who upon seeing you descend into a panic attack, tells you to “try to just breathe,” as if that’s helpful. But guess what? Certain deep breathing techniques can actually calm your nervous system, so it turns out that your friend’s advice is actually kind of helpful. Deep breathing might be a key tenet of meditation, but if you don’t feel like downloading an app or learning an entirely new skill, here’s an easy deep breathing technique, sans meditation, that you can do in 10-20 seconds when you’re feeling particularly panicked. Side note: my therapist introduced me to this technique 2 days ago, and it’s already helping.
First, Make Sure You’re Breathing From Your Belly.
Put one hand on your stomach, and one hand on your chest. Notice if you’re breathing more from your chest or from your belly by noticing which one expands when you inhale, and try to breathe in to your belly (instead of your chest) so that it expands. When the body senses stress and activates our fight or flight response, we start breathing rapidly from the chest to bring oxygen to our large muscles, which helped early humans flee from danger. But by breathing from the belly, we can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, also known as the “rest and digest” system, reducing our heart rate, blood pressure, and lowering stress levels.
Then, Take A Deep Breath In For 4 Seconds.
Take 4 seconds to take a deep breath in through your nose.
Hold The Breath For 4 Seconds.
Hold your breath for 4 seconds.
Release The Breath For 6-8 Seconds.
Take 6-8 seconds, whichever feels more comfortable to you, to release the breath. This is called Paced Breathing, in which you exhale longer than you inhale. Longer exhalations also help trigger the parasympathetic nervous system and combat the fight-or-flight response.
4. Limit Your News Intake
Yes, it is incredibly important to stay informed right now. But do we need a news alert every 5 minutes when the governor of a state 2,000 miles away has issued an order that has nothing to do with us but nonetheless stresses us out anyways? No, we do not. Staying sane while reading the daily news seems virtually impossible right now, which is why you need to limit how much you’re consuming.
Even better? Put the phone down before the news becomes overwhelming. Give yourself 20 minutes (or maybe 5 is all you can handle, which is also okay) each morning or evening to catch up on news from a reliable news source (The CDC, CNN, The NYTimes), and then stay off of it for the rest of the day. I know I know, you NEED to know RIGHT NOW if Tom Hanks is feeling better (he is don’t worry), but try to resist the urge.
And this doesn’t just go for news. If you have a particularly anxiety-inducing friend sending you daily texts along the lines of “I HEARD YOUR TOWN’S MAYOR IS 2 HOURS AWAY FROM SHUTTING DOWN ALL HOSPITALS/ROADS/GROCERY STORES/AND GAS STATIONS. BE PREPARED,” it’s time to tell that friend that those kinds of texts are not welcome right now.
Focus on what we DO know NOW, and not projections for what people think we might know in the future. That will ground you in the present, instead of allowing yourself to spiral into potential future catastrophes. And this advice stands even when there isn’t a global health crisis.
5. Download An Anxiety E-Book
If you want to dig a bit deeper into the sources of your anxiety, there are tons of free resources filled with helpful tools for learning about anxiety. Barnes & Noble (remember them?!) has an incredible list of free e-books that you can download for stress and anxiety, covering everything from productivity tips to mindfulness to practical tips to reduce stress and anxiety. We know that downloading a self-proclaimed “self-help” book sounds about as effective right now as reading your horoscope, but don’t let the name discourage you from finding what could actually be a great resource.
6. Interrupt Your Thoughts
The first step to managing your anxiety is noticing it. Notice your anxious thoughts. Notice how long your mind has been wandering off, chasing these anxious thoughts. And then whenever you notice these anxious thoughts coming back, say “stop,” maybe even out loud (yes, you might sound a bit…unbalanced…to the people around you, but you’re also probably self-quarantining right now, so this might be a better time than ever to try this technique). And then replace the thought with something more productive. Saying “stop” isn’t just a command, but it’s also a distraction— a way to interrupt repetitive thoughts that would otherwise play on a loop. This technique is thought to reinforce positive thoughts as well, making you feel more aware of your thought processes, and also more in control of your mind.
7. Try ASMR
Yes, hear me out. AMSR, or “autonomous sensory meridian response,” (or those whisper videos you’ve heard about on Youtube), has actually been shown to be an effective way to manage anxiety.
People with ASMR (because you “have” ASMR, you don’t “do” ASMR) experience a “tingling, static-like sensation across the scalp, back of the neck and at times further areas in response to specific triggering audio and visual stimuli. This sensation is widely reported to be accompanied by feelings of relaxation and well-being.”
Essentially, ASMR is a sensory response to certain sounds and visuals, which can vary for different people. In one study on ASMR from 2015, participants used ASMR to relieve symptoms of anxiety, seeking out “ASMR as an opportunity for relaxation, with 98% of individuals agreeing, or agreeing strongly with this statement. In a similar vein, 82% agreed that they used ASMR to help them sleep, and 70% used ASMR to deal with stress.”
If you suffer from anxiety, you already know that it can be debilitating. Anxiety hijacks your brain; it convinces you something is wrong. It’s terrifying and exhausting and has the power to make your own body feel beyond your control. One small thought can lead to fear which can lead to a dangerous descent into an anxiety spiral, which often happens quickly. Of course, medication can also be a life-changing option, and should be approached with zero stigma or judgment. The options and categories of meds can be confusing, so consulting a trusted medical professional is crucial here.
Extricating yourself from these spirals by a sheer force of will is just not possible, and requires divorcing yourself from the shame that convinces you that you can handle it alone. And one of the hardest truths to face is that you can’t, and you shouldn’t.
Marissa Pomerance is the Managing Editor of The Candidly. She’s a Los Angeles native and lover of all things food, style, beauty, and wellness. You can find more of her articles here.
