The 8 Pieces Of Clothing That Are Making Us Look Old And Sad (And What To Wear Instead)

Yes, skincare is great, but have you tried burning your capri pants?

by The Candidly Team

Before you scream at us, if you like your style and feel great in your clothes and you wear EVERYTHING ON THIS LIST, that’s fine. Better than fine even. If you love your wardrobe, we envy you.

But if you DO NOT love your wardrobe, and gently exhale whenever you open your closet doors, it could be, perhaps, because there are one or more of these culprits lurking inside of it. 

They’re not…bad. They’re just too ubiquitous in most of our lives. They can often dominate our outfits, and while some of them are indeed comfortable, they are mostly mindless, frumpy, and don’t in any way contribute to our “personal style.”

And by the way, even if you don’t know what your personal style is, these “pieces” are likely not pushing you to have one.

We are not judging you. We are not judging these clothes. We are simply saying there are better options out there, that serve similar purposes, and will make you look wildly better, brighter, more put together - happier. 

Ok, fine. Maybe they are bad. But we gave ideas about what to wear instead. Because we always like a solution. 

 
 

1. BRIGHT COLORS WITH BLACK PANTS

Why: We’re not opposed to color. Color can be joyful and fun. But when a loud shade is slapped onto black, it tends to look a little Sears catalogue - sort of like what you wear when you’re feeling uninspired to get dressed for the office on a Wednesday. It just makes outfits come off less luxe, less polished, and oddly, more bland despite the noisiness of the color itself.

WHAT TO WEAR INSTEAD:

  • Neutrals. Think creams and beiges and denims. These colors look chic and classic with black without clashing. And truthfully, they make your whole look appear more expensive, even when your pants are $30 from Amazon and your sweater is a spot-on dupe for that famous one that costs 4x as much. The one thing we will splurge on, however, is THE. VERY. BEST. denim button-down, which we wear with every black thing we own (see below for proof) and plan to continue for the rest of time.

  • Black on top. It’s foolproof. Wearing a soft, thin turtleneck or a perfect-fitting black tee as a base layer with a wide-leg black trouser will never cease to make you look like you know everything there is to know about looking chic at every age.

Here’s just a sampling of our same model from above applying these principles.

 
 

And here are some of our favorite pieces to wear with black.

 
 

 
 

Image from Pinterest

 

2. UNDERWEAR THAT LEAVES LINES AND BULGES

Why: We’re too old for flimsy bras and plasticky panties that create bizarre bulges all over our bodies. And having these ill-fitting undergarments show themselves makes us look even older. We finally sprung for the “good” underwear, and it’s changed how we look and feel in every single thing we wear. Here are some favorites in every category.

WHAT TO WEAR INSTEAD:

  • The Thong: Feel what you will about Kim Kardashian, the dollars she’s thrown behind Skims has resulted in them making some of the best-fitting/ feeling underwear out there, especially on curves. And especially - the thong.

  • The Brief: Negative Underwear is making the underthings we’ve always dreamed of, that perfect understated balance of comfort and gorgeousness. For briefs, we especially like those from their cotton line which has a cut that feels like we’re dipping a toe into the realm of sexy(ish). But if you want something utterly seamless that also smooooooths over thicker butts and bellies, THIS brief from Shapermint is thoroughly impressive.

  • The Boyshort: Another bulge-melting discovery from Shapermint is their boyshirt (see above before and after for a sample of how well it works).

  • The Bra: We’re in an age where our jewelry can read our heart rate and yet, we still suffer bras that cut into our backs so aggressively we basically can’t breath. But we have two bras that have given us new faith in bras. The first is THIS one from Negative, which we never seem to shut up about. It’s just easy and lovely on every shape. Another style that brings excellent seamless support, especially on larger chests, is THIS one. Check out the difference it can make.

 
 

And here’s a visual to give you some idea of why these styles are so good.

 
 
 
 

 
 
 

3. SENSIBLE SHOES

Why: Please don’t confuse this with us saying we don’t need our shoes to be unspeakably comfortable. Comfort is, without question, the principle requirement we have for our poor, tired feet. We demand support. Stability. Cushioning like you cannot imagine. But we don’t have to sacrifice beauty. We just don’t. Some brands have genuinely figured out what it means to make perfect-looking shoes that don’t kill our feet. And here are some of our favs.

WHAT TO WEAR INSTEAD:

  • The Little White Sneak: A white tennis shoe can be elegant now. With skirts, dresses, every length of jeans and pants. THESE are by leaps and bounds the comfiest of them all. And they’re chic. Truly!

  • The Comfy Booties: We ask only that our ankle boots be sleek and striking and classic and last forever. THESE do all that. And they do so with a 5-layer memory foam insole and elastic panels for zero stiffness. Also, they’re water-resistant, because we are still sensible old ladies. Always have been. Always will be.

  • The Platform Heels: Before you storm off to seek out a low-heeled wedge, consider this: blocky platforms offer endless support, while still giving us all that glorious height that makes our legs look 3 miles long. Everyone we know who buys THESE heels talks our ear off about them. And they have reason to. They’re Aerosoles guys, and yet, so, so gorgeous as our go-to dress-up shoe.

 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 
 
 

4. CAPRI PANTS

Why: Welp. They’re ugly. That’s why. But honestly. The length will just never look cute. If you have long legs, capris will chop them in a weird place. If you have short legs, capris will make them look shorter. In SHORT, stay away.

WHAT TO WEAR INSTEAD:

  • Cropped, wide-leg pants: Because they’re tailored to complement every naturally round bit of our body, wide-leg pants have a way of giving us the balance and proportions we deeply appreciate, as opposed to capris which tend to make our hips looks wider and our legs look like the bottom point of an upside-down triangle. We have two HUGE favorites in the land of wide-leg pants. We alternate between them daily. Both can either dress up or be casj enough to replace our jeans.

  • We’ve written entire articles about THIS pair, which is made from a “magic” material that’s as stretchy as joggers, but has clean lines that melt over curves. Also, they come in an enormous color and size range.

  • THIS pair from J. Crew has similar, flattering elasticity while looking very tailored and high-end. They’ve also become an essential component of our perfect work uniform.

 
 

 
 

Image from WomanWithin

 

5. TUNICS

Why: They flatter no one. If you’re wearing one because you want to hide your tummy or your butt, we get ittt. Oh, do we get it. But there are different ways. Better ways!

WHAT TO WEAR INSTEAD:

  • THIS Perfect, Perfect Button-Down: Yes, we could bore you with a loooong list of button-downs from a loooong list of brands. Or we could just show you the very best - in stripe and solid, naturally. Instead of being sad and sacky like a tunic, this shirt has all the chic elements of a crisp, classic button-down, BUT with a length you can completely control in the front or the back. Layer it open over a tank or tuck the front and leave the back loose and long, so you get all the coverage you desire, while still looking breezily chic … dare we say French?

 
 

 
 

Image from Etsy

 

6. BRIGHT COLORS AND JEWEL TONES

Why: Again, we’re not saying there isn’t a time and place for a bold pink or a lime green. But choosing too many intense hues can be overpowering and our overall taste level looks compromised and, well, kind of old.

WHAT TO WEAR INSTEAD:

  • Stripes: We’ve come to increasingly see stripes as a superhero of dressing after 40. We were honestly crazy enough to write a whole article about them. It wasn’t the most clicked on thing we’ve ever written, but we have zero regrets, because the argument remains true: Stripes turn boring clothes into foolproof LOOKS. Any striped thing we throw on will not fail to look intentional, styled, and elegant without being boring or stuffy.

    Here are two essential striped pieces we bought that have made getting dressed on days we have no idea what to wear 27x easier. The first is admittedly an investment, but we personally wear it enough to make it a worthy one. The second is also an absolute staple (we wear it constantly), and it’s almost always on sale. J. Crew, guys.

 
 

 
 
 

7. SHAPELESS BLAZERS

Why: We don’t like to use this word, but it’s the only one that pops into our heads every time we put on a straight, shapeless, blah blazer. And that word is “frumpy.” Cut correctly and with enough stretch, a blazer can be an absolute life-changing staple. But too many do absolutely zero for our shape. And we can barely move our arms, so we walk around looking stiff and uncomfortable. Because we are.

WHAT TO WEAR INSTEAD:

  • Well-Tailored Blazers With Stretch: We love THIS one as an oversized style that still looks modern and balances extremely well with everything we wear without just looking like a sack. And for a sleek, waist-nipping winner, THIS one is pretty special.

  • Jean Jackets: If there is one thing on this list that you will put on once, then proceed to wear almost constantly it’s THIS jean jacket. In addition to being the shape we all want but annoyingly can never find any time we try on a jean jacket, it also doesn’t feel restrictive. The dream! Needless to say, we wear it with e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. Also, the price is mad.

  • Leather (or Faux Leather) Jackets: Few stereotypically “cool” things are as age-defying as a leather jacket. And THIS faux one from Anthropologie has topped our leaderboard not just for the cut (it’s gooooood) but for the price.

 
 
 
 

 
 
 

8. LONG, UNFLATTERING TEES

Why: This might be a controversial option, but t-shirts don’t look good on us. Ok, most t-shirts don’t look good on us. And the reason is they’re cut high at the neck which is not ideal for anyone with any kind of chest, because they just puff out and fall flat, making us look bulkier than we are, And then there’s the sleeve, which often cuts right at the thickest part of our arm so A) it feels terrible and B) it looks terrible. We’re not saying never wear a t-shirt, but we offer a solution that’s been nothing short of a god-send for the daily putting on of clothes that look excellent on us.

WHAT TO WEAR INSTEAD:

  • 3/4 Length Scoopneck Tees: If this sounds too specific, then trust when we tell you that no one looks bad in this shape of shirt. Our favorite of all time is THIS one from Everlane, which also has this skinny ribbing that’s incredibly flattering.

  • Whisper Soft, Not-Too-Long Tees: For a looser-fit style, we like THIS one because even though the sleeves aren’t 3/4, they are a bit of a drop-shoulder which sort of narrows us up top but also feels 1000x more comfortable than most tees do on our arms. Plus, it’s the perfect, flattering length.

 
 
 
 
 

At The Candidly, we try a lot of stuff so you don’t have to. We only recommend things we truly love, and that we think you’ll love, too. All products are chosen independently by our creative team, and all details reflect the price and availability of products at the time of publication. If you buy something we link to, The Candidly may earn a commission.
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